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CAPTION: Physics department, Eagle State University
PROFESSOR (O/S): Wolfram Wolf.
WOLF (O/S): Professor Bullsworth.
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PROFESSOR: The department director and I had a lengthy discussion about your involvement in our interdisciplinary curriculum yesterday.
PROFESSOR: We have decided to relieve you from the theoretical physics research group, as your contributions have been, in a word, unhelpful.
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WOLF: "Unhelpful?!" What? Why?! But, I did my part!
WOLF: Lots of parts!
WOLF: What am I supposed to do, now?!
PROFESSOR (O/S): I don't know. That is your decision. I suggest you petition other departments to see what openings are available.
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WOLF: It's the Feynman diagram, isn't it? The one that emitted a donut?
PROFESSOR: That, and you cannot use the word "doodie in a doctorate-level research paper!