Sept. 11, 2016 - Words of the wise - 1

Transcript

32 comments

Jan

Every time I hear that phrase in the first panel while stuck in a company meeting or "team-building day", I always picture the second panel happening :P

Today's cameo appearances: OldTiger, Steviebear Maxwell's husky gal, Vandal, Tom Redlion, Terror Rage, and MishaFox. More cameos (and proper front views) next week :)

Jo Li KMC • 09/11/2016

Truly an inspirational and moving speech, sir.

... so, when's lunch?

drivernjax • 09/11/2016

@ Jan I quite agree with you on that one, especially the me part. That's usually what the speaker means when he says the first.

OmegaWolf • 09/11/2016

Think he's hungry. And unsure I should be glad I never worked at a place like that.

MetalExveemon • 09/11/2016

I've thought that too, that there is "Me" in "Team" as well! XD I just wish I had thought to say that any time somebody said "There's no 'I' in 'Team'" to me. Oh well...

Indagare • 09/11/2016

Now, whenever I hear this, I think of this: http://66.media.tumblr.com/73085a6229244e7eecf357449f37bc7c/tumblr_n78nfzlsFA1tp42tfo1_500.jpg

Sammy • 09/11/2016

Iff yu R A bad spelr, yu cann get luts uv wurds from anyting.

Tanabi • 09/11/2016

I remember one place I worked ... Someone had written the word 'TEAM' in all upper case in sort of blocky Commodore 64 letters, and then filled in a lower-case 'i' inside the square-ish 'A' shape. Someone had finally found the 'I' in team!

AlyxVixen • 09/11/2016

There's also tame and Tea...

KhaiRaccoon • 09/11/2016

Polar Bear: Mmmmm..... Meat..... This is so funny!!! Everytime when someone mentions food, I think of Homer Simpson. Keep up the good work!!! >w<

John Van Stry • 09/11/2016

I've always hated those kinds of motivational speeches. As a manager mine were more of the type of 'if we do a good job and get this done early, I'll try to get you all rewards bonuses and raises, and we can use the extra time to have a party!' And if people weren't going well, I'd tell them that they needed to come to me when they had trouble as soon as they realized it, so we could get it fixed. I didn't penalize for having problems, but I did if you didn't tell me about them.

And if all else failed, I made it clear that if they wanted to keep working for me, they had to get with the program. Or I'd fire them. Never had to fire anyone.

Vandal • 09/11/2016

And now it's becoming clear why so few herbivores work at this company. I can't imagine the average zebra wants to hear the regional director talking about meat in any context.

OldTiger • 09/11/2016

One of the luxuries of attack aviation is that everybody is pretty self-motivated. Doing counted more than talking. It got more fun when I led USAF ground combat troops (yes, they do exist...and 99.9% are enlisted men). I didn't have to work too hard to motivate them but I burned a lot of calories protecting them. Once your troops discover you really give a s**t...and that includes living and working in the same conditions they do, no pep talks were necessary. Smartest thing you could do was stay out of their way. I miss that in the civilian world...a lot.

TomRedlion • 09/11/2016

Boss's speech is making me hungry. Good thing there's a pizza in the oven right now.

soriac • 09/11/2016

I've been in several of these "team building" seminars, but I can't remember anything of it except quotes from the "clichee 101" handbook, and neither can my co-workers. I personally would expect that a good supervisor would be aware of the fact that every person is individual (well, except that single guy in the crowd over there...), but instead the real result of such meetings is not that everyone now works in a team but that everyone has been told that he or she is just a homogeneous mass and arbitrarily replaceable :-( Wait, I really remember one thing from these sessions, I usually had a very high score in the bullshit bingo :-)

Silverwolf • 09/11/2016

Church: "There's no 'I' in 'team.'" Grif: "There's no 'u' in 'team' either. So if I'm not on the team, and you're not on the team, then NOBODY'S ON THE GODDAMN TEAM! The team sucks!"

Perfesser_Bear • 09/11/2016

He's such an old ham bone...

Yes, there are a number of bossisms of which I am sick to the teeth, and this is one of them. Another is, It is what it is. Well, what the heck else would it be? Guava paste?

Katnik • 09/11/2016

... the zebra is staring at the thought bubble, is he a ... mind reader? @Tanabi - or get a very sharp pencil and draw in the All-Seeing-Eye...

There may be no "I" in team, but there is in "Win" - you can't be a Winner without "I".

Renzo • 09/11/2016

the english is very funny XD i laugh a lot but wait, what the heck with the spanish version? i think that is a joke imposible to translate

Jan • 09/12/2016

@Renzo Yeah, the joke is, as you said, impossible to translate :P So we went with chicken for the Spanish version. Mmm, chicken. Bukkawww!

ndrvr • 09/12/2016

Buddys of mine around my loc (west europe, switzerland) take the "TEAM" as an abbreviation in german: "Toll Ein Anderer Machts" , figuratively translatet to [eng] as "nice, someone else is doing it".

One of my former employer wasn't thaaaat excited about it :-)....

Katnik • 09/12/2016

@Perfesser_Bear , the bossism I hate worst is, "We're all a family here". Translation: "You're just a newcomer, not one of the clique, so we're gonna give you every crap job we can find." Never seen it to fail.

Mobyulus • 09/12/2016

"There's no u in team either, so if I'm not on the team and you're not on the team then no one's on the team. The team sucks"

Willibaldus • 09/12/2016

I dont believe in Teamwork anyway. Better everybody does his Thing and later there is a gathering with sorting out the best Option. If you understand that as Teamwork then i agree.

jprime • 09/13/2016

@Vandal He's not looking at anyone as he drifts off, so there's that.

Silverwolf • 09/13/2016

@Mobyulus: Already covered that one.

Gthefurrybiker • 09/14/2016

Heh, last time someone said that to me, my response was 'No, but there is a 'u' in 'c**t!'

WB101 • 09/14/2016

Oh those former careers...

There may be no “I” in team, but there is an “I” in “time”, and if you want this project completed “on time”, then “I” am a “team” of “1”.

Mr.Didi_rus • 09/14/2016

Hey Jan! Please translate the comic. They are interesting and funny. I want to read the comics without problems (too lazy to translate myself)

Jan • 09/15/2016

@Mr.Didi_rus Into which language? All translations are done by volunteers so if you know of any, send them this way :)

SuperBH • 09/20/2016

I hope that's coffee Jessie is drinking. She doesn't strike me as a tea person.

Silverwolf • 09/21/2016

@SuperBH: I don't think that's Jessie. If I had to guess Jessie's standing next to Jan in the first panel (if that is Jan, that is).

Mike • 09/24/2016

Personally that's not a line I want to hear from a predator... But that doesn't stop me from wanting to buy the redhead in the orange top a coffee.

LLNV & LLPT

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