Dec. 3, 2017 - Nyoom!

1
PHIL: Wolf!
WOLF: It's okay! If you buy another salad spinner, I will retune the motor to have less torque...

2
PHIL: I'm *not* buying a new salad spinner. I don't care how, but *you're* bringing back *a* functional, *non-altered* salad spinner by the end of the day.
WOLF: I suppose we can follow the trail of lettuce.
PHIL: "We?"

3
PHIL: I have to teach aerobic lessons in an hour.
WOLF: Ooh! Can I hitch a ride with you? Drop me off at the uni so I can pick up my personal transportation device.

4
WOLF: I didn't hear a sonic boom, so it must've gone below Mach 1. Let's assume its parabolic trajectory has an initial velocity of, say, 245 m/s, and a 45° incline. If it went uninterrupted due east, that means it would've landed --
WOLF: -- huh. *That's* not a good spot.

5
SIGN: Point Perkins -- nude beach